A Different Vacation

During the years my wife and I took care of my mom, we rarely got a vacation.  Even when we did get one, many times it was just three or four days in a cabin in the mountains.  At the end of the month, we are heading for Fort Lauderdale for some fun times at Southern Comfort Transgender Conference.  I attended SC in 1997 and 1998 through 2002, I was a staff member of the conference when it was still held in Atlanta.  At that time, I facilitated, with a trans man, the Big Brother/Big Sister program which paired newcomers to the conference with experienced conference attendees.  In some cases, it was actually the first time out in public for some of the newcomers which was my situation in 1997.  There wasn't a program in 97 and it took me something like 2 hours and 5 attempts to even open the door and go down to register.  At the end of the conference there was a meeting for those who wanted to volunteer which I did.  A couple of months after that, I was asked by the conference chairperson to start the program which we originally were only aiming at trans women but then we added it for trans men also. 

Now, I'm going back to the conference as a trans woman beginning her transition rather than the part time person I was back then.  I'm so looking forward to seeing old friends and meeting new people like Sarah McBride who spoke at the DNC this year.  It's going to be an amazing week!

Reconnecting With the Transgender Community

Several years ago, I was pretty well known nationwide and in a few instances, worldwide in the transgender community.  Oh not because I was an activist or anything.  I was a staff member of one of the largest transgender conferences in the world and I dealt with newcomers to the conference.  It was my job to help make sure they had a good time and if they needed assistance, they had a Big Brother or Sister to guide them.  Then my mother started developing dementia and I put everything on hold to become her caregiver.  For over eight years, I did nothing but care for her and my disabled brother.  In eight years, I had basically about two or maybe as much as three weeks of time off.  Total!  Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining because I feel good that I kept her out off a nursing home for that time.  After my brother and my mom passed away, I just more or less decompressed for a couple of years.  However during all those years, I pretty much lost contact with everyone I had known in the community except for a couple of people. 

Several years ago I established a Facebook account but I did very little with it up until November when I started posting on it regularly.  One thing it has helped me do is establish contact with a lot of the people I knew back then.  People who were really close friends until I more or less disappeared on them.  And that's allowed me to find some e-mail addresses of other people who aren't on FB. I was wondering if any of them would even remember me and I've been surprised.  So many of them have expressed happiness at reconnecting with me.  I also reconnected with someone who was one of my newcomers quite a few years ago and is now one of the best known transgender advocates in the country.  I'm very proud of her and I guess I kind of know how a proud mom feels when one of her kids becomes someone famous.